Hello my friends!
Well it has been awhile since I have posted anything here or even visited many blogs! In a way I feel bad that I have missed out on so much of your lives but I have had a good reason, really I do!
In the beginning of April I was struggling badly with my health and with my spiritual life. It’s really hard to explain but I really came to the end of my rope so to speak. It’s funny cause looking back it really wasn’t as bad as I felt it was at the time but in my desperation I cried out to God and he answered me by asking a question of me. “What are you willing to sacrifice for me? You say you love me and want to be like my son but you do not want to give up anything.”
I was devastated! “What do you mean Lord? I thought I was doing everything you asked of me?” His answer to me was so soft and gentle it still makes me cry…”I love you Crystal, and I want what is best for you and for 2 years I have asked you to fast and you refuse to do it, you will start and then give up before I can complete the work in you. You say you want me to help you with your weight issue’s and I have a plan to help you but you refuse to surrender in the one area that you are begging for my help in”. SMACK! I came face to face with my nemisis…my emotional connection to food and my refusal to surrender it to Jesus so that I can be healed.
So there you have it…the beginning of my Journey to Surrender! I have not completed my Journey, I am still on the road but I want to share my Journey with you! So for then next few weeks I am going to try to post every day and share a bit of my journal with you. There are two reasons I want to post something so personal; one to record my thoughts and revelations to remind myself of what God is doing in me; two is to hopefully maybe help just one other person who may be struggling just like me.
So starting on Monday May 12 I will begin the journal on my fast. I pray that it will be an encouragement to you!
On side note…It’s my birthday today! Let’s just say I am holding on 29 at this point but I am overwhelmed with my blessings and there is so much to be thankful for. Last night my daughter took me out for my birthday and we went to dinner & a movie. The movie was “Made of Honor”. I have to say it was one of the best chick flick movies I have seen in a long time. I am amazed at the beautiful generous woman my daughter is turning into she totally amazes me! I wish I could take the credit for the beautiful young lady she is today but God really has to be the one who gets the glory!
God has blessed me with a new job that I stared last week. It’s close to where I live(so I can walk to work if I want to…it’s only about 6 blocks, it will save us a ton on gas and I will get an extra hour in my day because I am not driving so far!), it’s full time and as a bonus on top of all of that I get to work with my friend Darla. Can life get any better than this? My life has sped up considerably in the last few weeks but it’s been good for me.
Well that is about it for today, I have so much to say but I think I will save it for my journaling in the next few weeks! Thanks for stopping by!